Friends introduced me to a healing insight illuminating the second half of this post’s title.
The insight, about parents, is – ‘s/he did the best s/he could, given the hand that life dealt them’. Only then did I start to feel love for my parents. The love didn’t fully flower until they had moved on to the next world – and I never sufficiently developed the care I wish I could have given them. No matter now I can.
The first part of the title of today’s post is from a wonderfully interesting video by Mark Wolynn – about how many of us inherit family trauma;
NOTES FROM The Science & Nonduality site HERE;
Unconsciously, we relive our mother’s anxiety. We repeat our father’s disappointments. We replicate the failed relationships of our parents and grandparents. Just as we inherit our eye color and blood type, we also inherit the residue from traumatic events that have taken place in our family. Illness, depression, anxiety, unhappy relationships and financial challenges can all be forms of this unconscious inheritance. Sharing insights and case studies from his new book It Didn’t Start With You, How Inherited Family Trauma Shapes Who We Are and How to End the Cycle (Viking, 2016), Wolynn will discuss the latest advances in epigenet- ics—how traumatic experiences can be inherited from our parents and grandparents—as well as the newest research in neuroscience that supports healing, how to break the patterns we’ve unknowingly adopted that keep the cycle of suffering alive from generation to generation. Wolynn will also present his Core Language Approach, a method for identifying inherited family trauma and decoding our own personal language of trauma.
Mark Wolynn, director of The Family Constellation Institute in San Francisco, is a leading expert in the field of inherited family trauma. A sought-after lecturer, he has taught at the University of Pittsburgh, the Western Psychiatric Institute, Kripalu, The Omega Institute, The New York Open Center, and The California Institute of Integral Studies. His forthcoming book IT DIDN’T START WITH YOU: How Inherited Family Trauma Shapes Who We Are and How to End the Cycle will be published by Viking/Penguin in April 2016.